Today marks the end of an era.
Since my first daughter Maya was born three-and-a-half years ago I’ve been taking Mondays off to be a stay-at-home dad. (My wife, Cybele, did the same on Wednesdays.)
When Sophie–our second–showed up, Cybele and I were both home on Mondays for a while, giving us a long supply of three-day weekends.
Last fall Cybele got a promotion and Maya graduated to preschool. Both of them went to five days. Sophie and I continued to stay home on Mondays.
This was a nice, but tough situation. When you’re running a company you feel like you should be there at all times. I felt guilty about having co-workers in the office five days a week when I wasn’t. Admittedly, I worked many evenings and weekends to "make up" for it, but I still felt like I was letting people down, or setting a bad example. (Re-reading this, I think I may have had it backwards.)
Recently, when flyte really needed an extra boost of sales and marketing, I found a friend/ex-co-worker/future Montessori teacher to watch Sophie on Monday mornings. This allowed me to come into the office for a few hours and assuage my guilt (and return my emails and phone calls.)
Then the other day Sophie’s day care called to let me know there was an opening on Mondays and did I want to take it?
I was torn. It was exactly what I needed, as my project manager is about to go on maternity leave and I’ll be taking her job on until she returns. (That makes about 47 hats I’m now wearing.)
On the other hand, I felt like Sophie was getting a raw deal. Maya had two days home a week with a parent (not including the weekend) and Sophie had only ever had one. Then one-half. And now none?
I was also feeling like maybe I was cheating myself. There’s truth to the cliché that they’re only young once. I love seeing Sophie master new skills, like stealing my cell phone and calling Cybele’s phone.
I ultimately decided that for the time being going to work that fifth day was most important, and I would try and be more "present" for both of my daughters during the weekend and during our morning and evening rituals. Hopefully, when I get my project manager back, I’ll figure out a way to run my life the way I want, and have my business support that lifestyle.
In the meantime, you’ll find me in the office on Mondays.
Here’s hoping you find your balance.
Rich Brooks
Dad. Husband. Entrepreneur.
Tags: Work-Life Balance | Parenting
